Attachment to an idea...

When people say, or think rather, they are attached to something, it is really a facade. It can also be very detrimental if that is not realized. Personally, I have really detached myself of many things and people in the past year. I would think I was attached to my family and friends. I mean there are days I can't breathe, literally, from missing them but I catch my breath and move on. For those of you that don't know, I moved 9 months ago from Miami to Los Angeles. I moved to a city where I know pretty much no one. I felt the attachment to my dog and would cry on certain days because I left her back home. YES! I cried for my dog - Don't judge me! LOL I purchased my dream car and would go nuts if I had crashed or had to sell it. I have a great home to go to every night. I am very attached to my home because if my home were to fall apart or I couldn't afford it anymore, I wouldn't know what to do. I have been attached to material and emotional ideas in my life. Yet, it is all as meaningless as that last millionaire idea you did nothing with. We are not attached, we are comfortable and pleased with ideas. We can not be attached because it all could change in 1 day, let alone 1 hour. You can not prepare for the unexpected but you can definitely be ready. It is the idea that I can not live with out these things or people but I can and so can you! I have learned to live without my mother physically and at times emotionally. It has been the hardest thing I think I have ever had to learn. I know her love is there, always present and our bond is continually growing stronger. However, we are not attached to each other and know how to function just through our love that flows. To be honest, my life seems like it is all falling apart at times and the things I had thought I was attached to are really not important. I am not attached to dancing, I just love the art of dance and am grateful to be able to make a living through it. Although, God forbid, if my path were to change tomorrow and I would have to do something else to survive, I will be ok and dance in my living room on my own time. I am not attached to the idea of being a dancer, I just love to dance. My car is a material item I thought had an emotional attachment to. No again! I originally bought the car because it was my dream car since I was a child. It was also a special edition for the cure for cancer. For those of you who don't know, I lost my grandfather to cancer. He was the reason for my passion in cars. I grew up learning and loving cars. So, not only did I buy my dream car but it had meaning to it. It represented my grandfather and the cure for cancer. I was attached to the idea that the car somehow could keep my grandfather near me. Not at all!!! That car could go tomorrow and my grandfather's energy will be all around me and all of the memories are with me, not in the car! So, house, car, lover, mother, father, friend, job, life - Do not be attached! There is no such thing, you can survive, as sad as the thought may seem without all of that. Attachment is an idea in our head. Realize that its the love of all these ideas that keep them alive and dear to you. My love for my mother will never go away, no matter how far she is; my love for that car will never go away - if it goes, every time I see it in the street, I will orgasm. LOL Let's not be prude, it is a figure of speech. My love for my dear friends, is always there; my love for my lover is there, even if I do or do not receive back. My love for my job is amazing and I'm grateful. My love for the idea of my home and of how my life should be is there, I'm still surviving because I'm not attached and I know it will come. The answer is to love it all but not be attached to it. Let things change and flow, it is the only way you'll learn and grow.

P.S. Wrote this on paper yesterday afternoon. While driving home late last night I saw a gentlemen crash his car on the highway into the wall right before my eyes. If I were going just a bit faster, I would have been in that crash! Lets all pray for that man and know that life can change in an instant so loving your ideals is healthy but being attached could really ruin your life.

Love you all!

Always Peace N Love,
You Know,

Janiece